Great leaders are able to create conditions to promote happiness, commitment and performance.
To do that these leaders use a mix of different skills, and empathy is one of the most important ones.
Empathy is about being able to understand someone else’s needs.
You don’t necessarily have to agree with your people but you should be able to feel compassion for what they are going through.
When you as a leader achieve a high level of empathy, you will be able to consider employees’ perspectives and appreciate their point of view. In addition, by engaging in healthy debate you will be able to find better solutions and achieve greater success.
Before we start, it’s important to say that empathy in an organization must start at the top. In fact, I believe that if leaders don’t care about people’s feelings and concerns, it will be more difficult to create an environment that promotes happiness, commitment and performance.
Here are five tips that you could use to improve empathy as a leader.
First, Listen to understand.
One of the easiest ways to improve your empathy skills as a leader is to cultivate the habit of getting out of your office and talking to your people. Ask them open-ended questions about what’s working and what’s not, or how they feel, then listen to understand rather than listen to respond.
To listen with empathy you need to suspend your own thinking, opinions and judgements.
Don’t just listen for the sake of listening; listen with open ears, open eyes and an open heart, which means that you could be attentive to what your people are saying, start with listening out for the key words and expressions that they use, particularly if they use them repeatedly.
It’s important to understand the emotions behind their words, as well as the nonverbal cues, including body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions.
Lean in when people speak, and show that you’re interested in what they are saying. In addition, spend some time considering how you come across when you communicate with others.
Remember: when people feel listened to without judgment and when you project a true desire to understand what they are going through, you lay down the foundation to promote openness and transparency
Second, Be open to different points of view.
Leaders who are able to recognize different perspectives and are open to different points of view can develop empathy more easily.
While talking to people, let go of your biases and be open to new perspectives. Even if people have feelings that are different from yours, don’t judge. Don’t look at the feelings of others in terms of agreement or disagreement, but look at them as an opportunity to better understand how they see the world.
The message here is simple: if you want to develop empathy, don’t criticize, don’t put too much emphasis on your own ideas and beliefs, be aware of your own attitude and keep an open mind.
Probably the simplest way to better understand a person’s position is to ask the right questions. So, in case of doubts, invite the person to provide you with more details to help you figure out what their points of view are.
Remember: you may not agree or even like what people are thinking and sharing but If you want to build a culture where people can reach their full potential, you, as a leader, should take their points of view and perspectives into consideration.
Third, Create personal relationships.
As we already said, empathy is all about understanding the feelings and emotions felt by others. So, another way to improve empathy is to create personal relationships with your people.
Creating a personal relationship will help you figure out people’s emotions, motivations and values.
At the same time, building a relationship with your people will help them understand that you care for them as human beings first and professionals second. This will create a culture that encourages open communication and fosters trust.
Sharing personal interests is the strongest way to build relationships. So, be curious about people’s lives and ask them questions about their families, their hobbies and their dreams. Take notes of the details: the names of spouses, husbands, children, parents, pets and so on.
Remember: when you as a leader lack empathy, people approach with their guard up. To encourage your people to be open about what they are thinking without feeling judged, mocked or ignored you need to form meaningful relationships based on trust and transparency.
Fourth, Show your emotions.
Nowadays, much of what people say in business is polished and sugar-coated. The messages are put together to hit the right tone. Whereas genuine emotions are often hidden.
Leaders usually hide emotions because they want to look strong and in control. But in reality, doing so reduces their control and weakens their ability to lead, connect and communicate. Because they don’t say what they mean and don’t mean what they say.
Genuine emotions are powerful because they show what people really feel and think. And because it’s rare and true, we are attracted to people who are willing to show their authentic feelings.
It’s true that being too emotional in business can create problems. Because it clouds the ability to analyze situations and lead to impulsive decisions. At the same time, emotions are critical to everything leaders must do such as setting a vision, building trust and inspiring people.
So, if you as a leader want to improve empathy, you need to show your human side and emotions with your people. In fact, you can’t expect people to show vulnerability if you don’t open up yourself.
Remember: If you’re happy, show it. If you’re angry, show it. Never hide your emotions. Because these are all human traits that make you friendly and approachable.
Fifth, Learn new things.
It is true that you cannot learn to empathize with others overnight but you can start learning new things right now to train your brain to think empathetically.
Empathetic leaders take some time to learn new things every day in order to sharpen their knowledge and broaden their perspective on life.
So you can do the same. For example you can read books, articles on empathy or watch an interesting documentary to change how you see the world. You can even travel to new places to open your mind and your heart so that you will be more able to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes.
Basically, to better understand the impact you may have on others you need to develop your knowledge and be exposed to new experiences, people, environments and more. By doing so you will be better able to understand what people feel because you have a wider perspective on the world.
Remember: Leaders who have the humility to admit that they cannot know everything and accept that there is room to improve and grow are the ones who are more able to develop empathy and create a learning culture within their organizations.
Summary
So, these are the five tips that you could use to improve empathy as a leader.
As a recap, we can say that the ability to empathize with people is one of the most powerful skills that any leader can have.
Leaders who lack empathy can damage relationships with people, which can lead to decreased productivity and performance.
Whereas, empathetic leaders are able to foster a culture of open communication, understand the motivations and worries of others, and encourage trusting relationships that will help organizations reach their strategic business goals.
So, build your empathy muscle to increase and deepen connections with your people while making them feel safe and cared for.
